Updated: Mar 18, 2019
KATIE ROST ORSINI ABUSED AND SCORNED BUT UP TO THE FIGHT
I studied journalism at Boston University College of Communication and graduated with honors in 2001. I won a prestigious award for a film piece I did on date rape.
My years at BU also saw me raise awareness of the students to the abuse prevalent in coed institutions and the frat gangs that ravaged the lives and reputations of unsuspecting female undergraduates.
So imagine my embarrassment and shame when after I finally married and thought I was settled down to domestic bliss did I instead become a statistic.
It is a fact that domestic abuse is the leading cause of death of married women in America and the cause is generally attributed to the mental ill health of the abuser and his drug or alcohol abuse and his financially superior position vis a vis his spouse.
In 2011 in Purcellville, Virginia I married Dr. James M Orsini Jr., on October 27th in a torrential snowstorm that had not happened like that since the end of the civil war.
To say it was a foreshadow to my life of hell is an understatement.
The night before the groom got shit faced drunk and made a series of calls to me and my mother saying he didn’t give a fuck about me and was not going through with the marriage. Problem for him was I was five months pregnant and the child was a masculine child and his father a Sicilian was not going to be deprived of his lineage.
Three other daughters would not bare an Orsini and besides his entire future and the future of the family was baked on James Orsini Jr. becoming a doctor and taking over his lucrative cancer practice in Montclair, New Jersey.
Problem was this son was a pisser.
He was always pissing away drinking too much getting into brawls, needing to be bailed out of jail and almost killing himself and passengers in a car that damaged his legs so badly that he cannot play the sport he once loved, football.
The drinking and brawling continued at BU where I met James. He wasn’t a love interest, he came up to my neck and he was vulgar yet amusing to me and my sorority sisters. My best friend and roommate didn’t understand why I let him hang around our dorm room at Warren Towers. I don’t either, maybe I felt sorry for him. He was cute, built like a stunted Roman gladiator and amusing.
I was always getting him out of bar brawls and found his love of strip joints exciting. The way James Orsini Jr treated girls who he claimed to be seeing was also amusing to me. I could tell they were just trappings.
When I left BU for Paris and then the world of modeling, I never figured I’d see him again. Years later though, Between a real bad decision about a high school friend in a bind and a stalled modeling career I made a fateful decision to take a road trip. That trip became my private hell.
Once married and settled into the role of doctor's wife and living in the home of my in-laws in their carriage house in New Jersey I experienced night terrors. They would begin after the third glass of scotch or the fourth glass of vodka. The only way it didn’t become violent is if he smoke pot and mellowed out on the carriage house porch. Most nights I’d sneak out the door when James poured that first glass. Other times we'd be at Essex County Country Club and James would tie one on, get belligerent and be asked by club staff to leave, much to the humiliation of his father who was the ECCC president.
I’d go to his folks at the big house and beg them to do something. Getting no support from Marie or James Sr I’d check into the hotel up the street. I’d call my mom and tell her I was at the hotel up the street but say things would be ok. I just needed her to know that she’d get a charge for the room. I’d also call my friend Maci Peterson and Andrea Kelly and her husband Damon. Most of the time the next day, James would say he had no idea what he did. He’d profess his love and devotion to me and the baby growing inside my belly.
I needed to believe that because what was I to do with my life so changed from my days as a self sufficient model traveling the world and hauling in 10,000 a day.
Other times after a terrible fight, he’d insist I go with him to get food at the local pizza joint in the neighborhood or go out to dinner. ..but three drinks into a bottle of red wine or vodka straight up, he was slurring his words.
Worst offense is he insisted on driving and so I had to live in fear that we’d be pulled over or he’d have an accident. Hey did I allow it? Yes. I feared for my life and I was stuck. Stuck on appearances and stuck on trying to get through the pregnancy.
I had it in my mind that if I could get him away from his parents compound and we were on our own I could control his rage, which was really because he didn’t want to do this, he didn’t want to be a doctor, he wasn’t that interested in it and really wanted to do what I did, act, model and live a more creative life.
He resented me and my friends and he resented what looked to him like an easy gig. He knew I booked a days modeling shoot with a client and made more than he did in a month. Even when I was pregnant. He also knew that I seemed more important to his father than he because of the baby boy I was carrying. So the beatings began before James Rocco’s birth. He stage it as though “we” were having a fight, that would involve him insulting me then pushing me to a pint of rage as well and the verbal abuse escalated.
His father knew about the drinking and drugging it was clear that his addiction was taking a toll on his medical studies. The abuse both physical and verbal continued to take its toll on me too. I have suffered from anxiety all my life. It started when I was in high school after I was sexually attacked. I had to create a safe space for myself within the confines of the world I created at school and at home and with friends who knew my problem. Anxiety can make you debilitated. When I had to meet a client or go on a go see for work I had to imagine myself leaving the apartment in Chelsea and walking to the subway and getting on the subway and walking into the showroom where the models were going to present themselves for the client. I got good at shaking off the pressure inside my head. When James became aggressive I retreated into a shell much like that I used to support me when I had a panic attack.
When he was particularly nasty, I would ball up into a knot in the bed or on the sofa of our apartment.
James Orsini Jr had gone to an Island school for medical school and had bought an internship at NYU and in order to follow his father into his practice he’d need a masters in oncology. He was at his most terrorizing when he had to study for his board exams and couple that with the lost bets on football games...it was anyone’s guess when he’d lash out. And when we attended the obligatory Orsini’s large Italian extended family events, during holidays, baby christenings and weddings he was known to tie one on and embarrass himself and his father who looked to me to keep him in line.
Although I did as I was told he would later hold it against me and argue that I should have stood up to his father and his mother whom he derided as "worthless" and as someone who was just sucking the life out of his father and spending all his dad’s money. They had a complicated relationship to say the least.
One of the videos on my foundations YouTube site is of us coming back from a wedding in New York after James Rocco our son was born. James was so angry with me for what seemed like no reason, he yelled and screamed until the baby began to cry in the back seat. I asked him to pull over so I could get out. He pulled the car over and I attempted to escape by exiting the car. He was able to drag me onto the shoulder to a bit of grass. I ran from him and he tackled me to the ground. He pulled me back to the car and I got in and locked the doors and started the car and went home. That night he entered our apartment and sodomized me. He strangled me and punched my body and kicked me out of the apartment. I went to the front desk in the apartment complex and they called the police. When they arrived they arrested James and I took out a peace warrant and TRO. I intended to leave finally. But I his father kept asking me and then my mother if I would drop the charges and suggested I would be taken care of and that of course I should leave James for this and he would help me.
He got a lawyer for me to represent us during the DYFS Hearing. My mother was livid why did you do that she asked and I told her of James Sr’s offer. I was desperate and I no longer had a career in modeling and I didn’t want her taking care of me. I thought with treatment James would be better. I believed his father that he would send him for treatment. I was ordered by DYFS to keep James out of the of the apartment for six months and we were ordered to attend marriage counseling. James did anger management programs and because he was monitored for alcohol and drug abuse he towed the line. I thought James had turned the tide. We dated during the time he was gone and I got pregnant with twins. Back in the apartment for less than a month on February 14 of 2013, he beat me and kicked my swollen belly. My neighbor called James father and instead of taking care of me he came into the apartment and determined that I should see a doctor, and when the doctor called my mother she learned that James Sr had called a psychiatrist to have me committed. My mother answered the questions asked about my psychological background and family history and said I was not ADD and I was not bipolar and she had no idea why James had prescribed me narcotics that were allegedly used for that purpose. In the end they found no grounds for putting me into a watch ward. I found out that he had drugged me. Interestedly enough James had once said to me that his mother had once tried to leave his father and pretty much the same fate had followed her. Marie told me James Sr. used to put medications in her drink to "calm her down" without telling her. As for my mother and my best friend Maci, they got there immediately. As did Andrea yet again.
The marriage was over.
I went to live in my homes in Maryland and Virginia and I gave birth to my girls in Maryland. The terror of the marriage was replaced with the terror of the system. The Bergen Family court system. Jame's father’s attorney came after me for leaving the state. I should have filed another restraining order that day or immediately after I left town. Instead of accepting blame and allowing me peace while I tried to bring the twins into the world, I was ordered to return with the boy. Later on the court adjusted to week on week off visitation because I was pregnant but clawing jurisdiction over my unborn twins.
The program for visitation was meeting up at the Delaware Visitor center for the drop off of James Rocco. When the girls where born James and his mother and his girlfriend came to Maryland to visit weekends. A year later we agreed in writing in a contract called an MSA gotten with the assistance of lawyers on both side, that I would attempt to settle back in Bergen until James finished his masters program. James Sr again made and promises to keep me in a fashion that would make me the happiest woman in America…I would be treated like a queen and he would provide me financial resources to return for this period while James finished his masters in oncology.
I moved with my nanny who’d been with me since the twins were born to live in a small two bedroom apartment in Riverside. The promises of course where not kept they were not part of the written agreement they had been verbal and from James Sr and so four months after I moved to Bergen I got the job with the Real Housewives and I got a written agreement in the form of a google calendar and a cola tract sighed by James Jr that I could become a Real housewife of Potomac in their pilot season. He also agreed that the kids could participate in the show. I had a great pilot season, everyone was happy with our work and I was into my second contract with True and Bravo when James kept the kids over a weekend and refused to return them per our google calendar and True entertainment agreement.
That began two years of financial, verbal and mental abuse. That is not to say that the three years prior to that was a bed of roses with James. He was always verbally abusive and difficult. When I became successful and when I became engaged to be married he lashed out and working with Frank Zinna a former magistrate judge there began a war of attrition clawing back my time with my kids and executing a father rights smear campaign. We were ordered to retain a mediator and James and his father dictated that the mediator had to be of his father’s liking, I was to pay half of the $10,000– $5,000 each. I maintained throughout that I wanted to return to the provisions of the MSA with me as PPR and James with visitation. I then retained a lawyer to seek removal of the kids jurisdictionally to Montgomery County Potomac Maryland, where they were in Jewish day school. James and his attorney refused to abide by the agreement with Bravo and made me writes into a parenting agreement that I would not have them on the show and that I would not disparage him on the show or tell anyone about what had gone on in our marriage. By consent I agreed and yet he continued to refuse me access to the kids, using every opportunity to say I was late getting them to him after a visit or saying that their clothes were disheveled or they did not have on socks or under ware.
He would illicit the support f the parenting coordinator and then the guardian ad liter whom all seemed to be in cahoots to paint me as a bad mother. I was overwhelmed and abused by the system and tormented by James Sr and Jr. Then they started going into court alleging I was “crazy" and should be examined or that I was on drugs. What I was on was anxiety and post traumatic stress. I almost suffered a mental breakdown under the pressure and without my family and friend I would have broke.
In March of 2018 Judge Firko ordered James to pay me child support and to determine a parenting agreement where we would have 50/50 time with our children. She dismissed his claims that I was "crazy" or that I was influenced by drugs as nonsense, noting that I argued my case pro se for the last year very well and overall declining his suggestions as ludicrous. Unfortunately she was elevated to the appellate court.
On June 27th a new Judge Mecca on the eve of a plenary hearing the new judge decided after 30 minutes or less that I was "crazy" and that I could not have access to my kids without supervision and that my mother could not be the supervisor and that I had to be evaluated by someone she suggested and as an afterthought the two of us, James and I, were to be evaluated and she made James the PPR.
No evidence was taken.
No witnesses were called...
and no records were reviewed.
I asked her to reconsider her order and she stated that I had put forth no evidence why she should.
Abuse takes many forms.
I have suffered at the hands of a mentally abusive man for over 6 years now. He has used the court system in New Jersey known for its ole boy network and its graft and corruption. James Jr had the ability to make be deeply anxious and depressed. Knowing that impact he would sit next to me in the court room and I would react with agitation. My mom and my uncle Sig would be in the court room with me most of the last year and having their support gave me the strength to stand my ground argue coherently and win motions arguments to the chagrin of Frank Zinna. But the day Judge Galina Mecca took my children away and gave them to my abuser my mother and my uncle were not in the court room. It was just me feeling like I had this because we were scheduled only for a status conference for the plenary hearing ordered by Judge Firko, which would occur the next month.
What happened was terror pure swift and evil. I was told I was crazy and needed a psychiatrist evaluation out of no where and entirely against what Firko had stated in her order the month previously, and in a act of seeming “ parity” James would need one too she opined ignorantly, and finally and ridiculously she ruled that since the children were in schools in New Jersey and New Jersey had jurisdiction, she was making James PPR a feat usually confined to an evidentiary hearing with witnesses, and my just like that with flourish my MSA contractural and binding agreement was “geographically unworkable and void.” No hearing just her decisions all cooked up by she and Frank Zinna. If I didn’t submit to the evaluation I could not see my kids. I did not see my kids for five months now because every time I tried to set something up James would block me. Terror and abuse at the hands of my abuser.
Anxiety set in and depression beckoned.
Yet I survived and I got a call from Gizelle my housewife. She gave me cover.
I met a great guy 12 years my junior, we got pregnant and I was happy for a while, we were happy but a hole exist in the bottom of my heart and I could feel my kids yearning for me and I had an instinct in my spirit that James was being abusive again based on out of the blue text attacks and rants he sent to me that seemed alcohol fueled. I knew my children wanted to see me and they wanted to know their to-be-born sibling. I wrote a brief and argued for a return to the MSA agreement. It was denied and so I am fighting back in a bigger and better court for women like me. It goes. I will prevail. I am doing it.
Here is the argument I made to the court:
The Honorable Gallina Mecca
Superior Court State of New Jersey
Family Court Bergen County
10 Main Street
Hackensack, New Jersey
Dear Judge Mecca
I received your clerks letter advising me that oral argument would take place on February 8 at 11:30 am and that I can attend telephonically.
If you read any of my pleadings before you decided not to consider them, you should certainly already be aware that my career as an actor was interrupted by James Orsini and his lawyer two years ago and resulted in me losing a $115,000 contract with NBCUniversal.
Just recently Judge Zinna sent a letter to NBC Universal attempting to get them to fire me using your order from June 27th that I not disparage James Orsini in front of the children and threatening a lawsuit.
My employer agrees that the YouTube videos he referenced do not constitute disparagement and that your order lacks merit as a violation of saying things in front of the children about their father. The video is his voice calling me a “cunt” and a “bitch” and “stupid” and telling me to “drop the babies off,” while he was drunk and driving. The incident culminated in his sexual assault of me, which is in the record.
I have asked you and every judge in New Jersey for the access to my children granted in our MSA. I have a right to parent my children and any change usually requires proof of a substantial change in circumstance before a trier of fact with each side giving testimony and evidence of what is in the best interest of the children. No hearing has yet occurred and according to you is “moot.” That is an usual use of the word.
When I read N.J.S.A 9:2-4 ( c ) there are mandatory factors the courts must weigh. You didn’t weigh anything. You substituted your judgement for the contract and accepted the lies and perjury of my abusive narcissistic ex husband that I abandoned my children. You decided that my rights didn’t matter only his. Your opinion doesn’t say one thing about the best interest of the children.
I have an agreement that gives me joint legal and physical custody and he visitation every other Thursday through Sunday. That parenting agreement became superseded by his agreement with me and Bravo and by our Google calendar executed in 2016 that covered the period I was working for Real Housewives of Potomac and my relocation to Maryland/Virginia.
I have an agreement that said that he was to pay me child support of 475.00 every two weeks until he or I made more money and that we would share our income tax returns to determine that.
I had an agreement that said that no discovery was available after the parties signed and presented their agreement to the court for enforcement.
I have an agreement that says that if one or the other violates the agreement the other gets the time lost back. I have lost 6 months time from my children.
Judge Zinna knows there is an agreement and he knew about the Bravo agreement and the fact the kids lived in Maryland with me for three years leading up to James kidnapping. He has put the MSA in the front of every motion to every New Jersey Judge who I asked to enforce my agreement and they have all done his bidding despite the contract, winking and nodding and punishing me for asking for respect and my rights.
The reason James Orsini asks you for PPR and no child support payments to me is to continue to abuse me and my children emotionally and financially. I have asked for legal support from this court to fight his abuse of process but instead I get judges who fulfill his every demand.
He went three years without paying me child support when the kids primarily lived with me in Maryland and went to school at the Binderman Jewish Day school and when James Rocco went to Aidan Montessori school, a place I once attended as a child. He did the parent teacher conferences with both schools. If anything constitutes a change it occurred then and it occurred in my favor based on agreement of the parties. What he did by enrolling the kids in a school without my consent is a violation of our agreement and further putting them in a public school is against our agreement.
You and Judge Mizdol say that the geographical distance makes it impossible to enforce the agreement and you decided that this means the kids have to go to a school he quickly and wrongfully put them into so he could create a rational for you to make me accept that I could not take them out of that school. The agreement states that we have to agree on school. He has created a situation which you then allow to stand.
I and my family will all attend your oral argument hearing on my motion for reconsideration of your 18 page ruling giving James Orsini PPR, stripping me of child support, maintaining alienation of affection from and for my children, and setting up some false evidentiary scenario where I refused to see my kids for 5 months. Violating an agreement that was only ever modified by the parties three years ago giving me the right to be in Maryland and Virginia with my children and them being a part of my work versus your ruling is without basis and required an evidentiary hearing on the merits. I am deeply offended.
My family is deeply offended. My mother is beyond offended as she has not seen her grandchildren for 5 months and my great grandmother as well.
In my motion to reconsider I asked your honor to reverse this troubled course. I asked that you vacate your ruling from June 27 and December 18, because I want to have my children with me per James Orsini’s agreement three years ago signed by him and given to Bravo my employer and me.
I have been alienated from my children based on your and other judges rulings in this state and I will go about correcting that as I have been denied my constitutional rights by the state where you all allowed by abuser to refuse to allow me to see my children per my MSA.
I continue to object to you and to the states’ role in my injury and to your insistence on violating my and my mothers’ rights A contract is a contract and no one in New Jersey has respected my contract from the moment he kidnapped my children and held them two years ago. What he’s learned is that he can create changed circumstances by holding my children and making unilateral decisions about their lives and hold that up as evidence to Judges so that they say “oh you agreed.” I didn’t agree to being hosed and abused and violated.
I tried last weeks to chat with my children. He hangs up the phone when I call. Do you believe James Orsini and Judge Zinna, that I have not, that my mother has not, tried to stay in communication with these kids.
Just in case I missed something like the supposed change in circumstances that created the need to have this entire mess occur, I said in all my pleadings and the evidence is clear that I have always lived in two states and the kids have always traveled between two states and gone to schools that were agreed to and informed of to James Orsini.
For the past two years I have objected to every illegal action and judicially inspired requirement scammed up by Zinna that I have had to consent to a visitation schedule different from our original parenting agreement, or the agreement we entered into when I left New Jersey to work for Bravo in Maryland in 2016 through 2017.
Under duress and with continued violation of my rights Bergen County Family Court, racially biased Judges had colluded and conspired with Zinna to deprive me of my constitutional rights and violated my due process rights.
Beware, lest you illegally determine that the fact that he took and put our children in a public school means that they have to be in the state or have to go to that school. Read the agreement. We have to agree. They do not have to reside in the state of New Jersey. They have lived in Maryland and Virginia and attended school in Maryland. They have been and integral part of my work on the Real Housewives. James Orsini signed a contract and used a google calendar for three years and reneged on it and now tries yet again to get me fired.
He never consulted me about putting them in Essex Fells public school. I didn’t agree to that. He uses the fact that he violated the agreement and put them in a school to deny me access to my children and to set up a scenario that this school must be attended, is also a violation of the agreement and shows his unwillingness to abide by the agreement. This is a factor to consider in a true evaluation of what is in the best interest of the children.
I did not agree and do not agree that the children should be in Essex Fells public school. The principal has been asked to call the police on me at his request. Why should I agree to have them somewhere his family members work?
You can’t decide that the kids have to be in school in New Jersey. Read the agreement.
I suffer continuous trauma and abuse from his tribe or politically connected “family” and all he wants is for me to know that he controls the world in New Jersey and they jump to do his bidding.
You must allow these children to be removed to me in Maryland and Virginia where I have the ability to be with them and raise them to be better people.
I want you to know I object to everything requested to be addressed in this upcoming hearing, said in any response to my motion, and I again state that counsels pleadings are lies and his clients certification is a lie.
I object to Frank Zinna and his illegal motion pleadings practice as an abuse of process. Something I will address properly in the future. James Orsini is a public figure, he is on social media as a top doc and is subject to public scrutiny by the public and that includes me and his abuse of me is relevant. His lawyer is out of line telling my employer you gave an order saying that I could not say anything about his character to the public.
Frank Zinna committed perjury with his statements that I refused or my mother refused to provide him discovery. He and his client created bogus pleadings and filed motions that were not proper or in order, and in the filing of them attempted to obfuscate what the real issues are so that the court would believe that a controversy around custody exists when none does.
We have joint physical and legal custody which was agreed to by the parties, which came after three custody and three psychologists evaluations and four years of court hearings which resulted in hundreds of thousands of dollars in personal wealth being wiped out as well as my career being halted.
Did you read the record? Did you read the agreement? Zinna has and everything he and his client have done for the last two years is hide the contract between lies and verbiage and collude with the staff of Bergen County Family Court to violate my rights. They did because I am black and I don’t have any rights in the eyes of people who only see the name Orsini.
As I stated in my letter and in my motion. The state of New Jersey must enforce the MSA. I was not ever required to live in the state and when the kids lived with me in Maryland and Virginia I gave him visitation by bringing them into the New Jersey.
Geographical distance is not a requirement in the agreement and your saying so does not make it so. What trial was had to make that determination. What questions did you ask about what the children were doing when they were with me in Maryland and Virginia. The only thing that happened here is James Orsini’s slow drag of my rights to parent my children and take them wherever I wanted so you denied me the ability to do that by calling me crazy and requiring supervised visitation in the state.
What kind of man denies his children access to their mother at such tender years even if a judge says what you said? One who is abusive. If he treats me this way how is he treating our children. That’s what a domestic relations court in Bergen once asked and I failed to stop it in its track then. I will reveal the graft and the favors done for retired judges and a psychiatrist who has an on line dubious degree.
I think you should tell James Orsini to hand over my kids immediately. I will get a mediator of my choosing to work out visitation and when you do that I think he will figure it out. Unless someone stops him now he will keep violating me.
I am pregnant. James Orsini kicked and beat me while I was four months pregnant with my twins. That’s why I left New Jersey. That’s why my girls where born in Maryland. The guardian ad litem said that each of us had wonderful homes and he only gave James a tilt in favor of PPR because he didn’t know why I left New Jersey. Yet and again Judge Firko did not give him PPR. YOU and your clerk gave him PPR before there was even an adjudication of changed circumstance to warrant a change in the MSA. He knew he didn’t have PPR that’s why his lawyer filed an illegal motion on the eve of our having a hearing on child support and parenting.
I must reiterate….I never domiciled in New Jersey and I left by x husband after less than 18 months of marriage because I was beaten by my husband not once but several times. Our daughters were born in Maryland and after our divorce was final and we had negotiated an MSA I agreed to live within 20 miles of James while he was in medical school because he stated during negotiations for the MSA that he would consider moving to Maryland or Virginia when he finished his degree.
After four months into his program I returned to my home in Maryland for a job with NBC Universal because he didn’t give me enough money to live. He was making only 50,000 a year. I went back to live in my home and my kids went to school in Maryland and DC. I had a job as an actress on the Real Housewives of Potomac. He agreed to my job and he agreed to allow me to have the kids in Maryland and Virginia. He knows of both homes as we were married in the Virginia farm house, and I have lived in them continuously for over 20 years. He signed an agreement with Bravo and we have a google calendar with dates for his visitation. The children should be with me, I should be PPR, I am a stay at home mom. Those facts were never developed in your haste to give him everything and me nothing. Your ruling on an illegal motion in advance of a prior order for a plenary hearing on matters pertaining to child support and a parenting agreement constitutes gross error.
My family provides me resources to provide for my children and James should provide an appropriate amount of child support that reflects his salary so that they are afforded the life they are entitled to. He is unwilling to do that. I am the only one who would assure that these kids get the benefit of both parents. He won’t. This whole thing is about money. He didn’t want to pay me 475.00 every two weeks for three kids and when he made more money after his masters program was completed he was terrified he’d have to pay me more and he did this to me and to our kids.
I want nothing to do with New Jersey and nothing to do with Bergen Family Court, but we will be on the line, all of us.
I certify that the following is true and I invite you to rule on my statements here and in my pleadings to date.
Katie Rost Orsini
On February 8 during a telephone hearing with Judge Mecca and with James’ attorney Frank Zinna saying things that were lies and worst, I began to bled profusely while I listened to Judge Mecca deny me my request to be reunited with my children. James was silent as his actions twisted a knife in my sides. A few days later, distraught and afraid after finally passing the fetus I got into the shower and laid down to cleanse my body. I was in intense pain. My boyfriend took the picture of my body. Later he showed it to me. I asked him to send it to me. He posted it on my
Instagram page and we signed it #metoo. I blanked out while I miscarried and don’t remember much about what happened next. Later I recall the post was still up. I took it down but not before the internet went wild. I do not regret Jacob taking and posting the picture. It is what it is. It is what Jacob saw. I haven’t talked to him about it and I must admit I questioned why he took it. Whatever his reason I know that it’s his truth and it’s the truth about abuse and stress and trauma. Now I must decide whether after five years I will file the action I should have filed when I left New Jersey. It seems that my abuser will not stop unless I expose him publicly.